Discipline Your Image

"We use the buddy system. No more flying solo. You need somebody watching your back at all times. Second off, you're gonna learn to discipline your image. You think I got where I am today because I dressed like Peter Pan over here?"

So, the weekend started with a plan -- an ambition, a reasonably attainable goal, if you will.  And with a cohort.

I was lamenting to a friend that I need more competition to get myself motivated to do stuff. Get off my ass and go to the gym, run faster or longer if I do manage to get to the gym, eat better, whatever.  Commiseration ensued.

And a plan was hatched for gradual substitution of bad habits with good ones. Or at least, better ones.  In my case, this means weaning myself off the sugarbomb soda and eventually dialing it back to iced tea or water or what have you.

(I'm guessing tea.  I don't know why, but I can't get onto the Water is Awesome! Drink It All Day! wagon.  And I don't do hot beverages, so coffee is a non-starter.) 

For sundry reasons, my friend backed out before anything got off the ground. Which I guess makes the competitive part of me glad (I win!), but is sort of disappointing in that the goad is gone. (I lose.)

So, I'm still going to move forward with my plan -- drink a regular amount and chart it, then drink one less a day, and one less and one less and so on until I'm completely converted. I have no idea if it will work better than the "just drop it all at once and get the hell over yourself" method. I would imagine the blood sugar headaches will be held at bay a bit better.

All this noise led to some woolgathering on this morning's commute.  I remember dieting when I lived alone -- and it was much, much easier than now, when I live with two males blessed with metabolisms that could eat Manhattan and not gain an ounce. (Or if they do gain, they don't care.)  It was definitely easier to get up and move around when I was single and had dogs to walk, plus I was a flunkie whose job consisted of 8 hours and out. (And I was already thinner and more energetic, cough cough.)

But it was also harder to justify a lot of those changes, as I didn't really have anyone to make them for besides myself. I was dieting to wear cute clothes, not to stay alive for family, so I'd skip meals one week and then I'd go to the other extreme and binge at Burger King the next.  I drank a fair amount. I don't now, primarily because Not Your Average Blogger abstains, but also because I'm responsible for more than just two dogs who could pretty much fend for themselves.

(I had a similar thing with psychotropic drugs, way back in the day. At a certain juncture in my narrative, I couldn't really see any point in not partaking every weekend. Why not? It was cheap, it was easy, it didn't make me sick, and I knew about how much time was going to be burned on the experience. Then I graduated and got my own place and it occurred to me that if my house burned down it would be a problem if I wasn't sure whether the walls were really melting or not. So much for that.)

I don't miss drugs at all, strange to say.  I never smoked, so I can't speak to that.  As for alcohol ... I don't miss the hangovers. I only occasionally miss the numbness and euphoria. And every so often I will drink socially up to the point where I realize I'm about to embarrass myself. These days, I tend to stop and excuse myself before that happens, rather than after. At least, I think.

But I do sort of wonder if I'm a different person than I was and I am fooling myself thinking I'm pretty much the same, just a bit more boring.  And I wonder if forgoing my other vices will make me even more boring.  Being a fat sugar-holic isn't a very interesting vice to begin with, so I am thinking not.  Still. I know smokers who quit and then turn into sanctimonious blowhards who disdainfully sniff about how annoying smokers are. And people who go into therapy and then insist everyone should try it. Will that happen to me? Will I become a tea hound who rails against the sins of corn syrup?

Maybe I should cut back by one every other day.

Comments

[Amanda]

By all means, cut out soda if you can. That helped me lose 20 lbs. Then maintain after I quit exercising. It's empty calories, which isn't much help when it tastes So Good and you're working overtime and tired and need a little jolt or you'll fall asleep at your desk. I think I lost track of where I was going with that.

Good Luck!